Do What Works Best

Last week, our family got to experience two different large school projects. My third grader had to complete an essay and a display, along with dressing up as a famous person for an interactive Wax Museum. My kindergartener got to create a cardboard box car for the Kindy 500 for parents and fellow students to enjoy.

I am not the mom that jumps into over-the-top creative projects with my kids. In fact, I cringe when I see the assignments come home and want to run and hide in my closet (obviously the mature response). Some days I wish I could channel my inner Martha Stewart, but it just ends up becoming a stressful argument on both sides, because my opinions and advice end up going against my child’s creative vision. I think it's more fun to see what they come up with on their own, even if it’s crooked and a little messy.

Hard work

David’s teacher had them complete the display board entirely in class, while another group had them sent home. The difference was notable when exploring the wax museum display. Some were quite elaborate, and obviously had an adult’s assistance. Others, including my son’s, were very detailed, but completely handwritten, and had some eraser marks and uneven lettering. I’m proud of the hard work that all the kids did, and I can certainly appreciate parents providing help, but I’m thrilled that my son had to do it all himself. The only work I had to do was find a USA style tracksuit he could wear as Michael Phelps, so he didn’t decide to show up to school in his Speedo jammers!

Super-cool car, missing one wheel!

Moving on to the Kindy 500. Max’s little cardboard car had 6yo style tiger stripes, some orange painted cut-out lightning bolts, and a cardboard steering wheel and license plate that David helped color and decorate. Any suggestion I made was shot down, but this was his project, not mine. Of course, I’d looked online, and there were some cardboard car samples that were fancier than the real car I drive. I stepped away, let his big brother and dad help a little (mainly with shoulder straps) but let it be how he wanted. He came home and said his car wasn’t as nice as the other ones his classmates brought in, and when I went to watch, it was true. But, it was his car and his creation. I’m more proud of his own work than I would be if we had spent 17 hours cutting, spraying, glueing and concocting an elaborate car with moving wheels.

I am in no way criticizing parents who love these projects and I think in some families, they can be a wonderful use of creative energy for quality time. Just not ours! We can all accomplish good work, for ourselves and our kids, as long as we try our best. Just remember that one elementary project may be a complete DIY by a strong-willed kid who wanted to create on his own, while his or her parents were busy working or doing chores. And, consider that the elaborate, perfectly painted car may have been an enjoyable bonding experience for another family.

We all win when we try our best, give kids the space to create independently, and let what works for our individual families shine through.